Thus far, my blog has described little about the lifestyle of Swedes, but these cultural and lifestyle differences make up an important part of every study abroad experience. Therefore, today's blog post is dedicated to my experiences with these customs and lifestyle views.
1) The concept of "lagom":
Last Thursday/Friday, Stockholm was hit by a crazy snow storm. We got about 8 or 9 inches of snow (not a lot in comparison to the crazy blizzards in the US). Anyway, there was chaos everywhere because the roads were completely unplowed (how is this possible in a snow-laden country?). In fact all the buses and above-ground trains were canceled due to poor weather conditions. What did this mean? Snow day! Snow day brings me to my first comment on Swedish lifestyle: the term "lagom". Roughly translated, it means everything in moderation. In the advent of snow day, I decided to not walk the 3-4 kilometers to work and went shopping instead. Apparently, every Swede in the area had similar ideas. The mall was packed, and people were basking in the glory of what this snow day had brought them. No one was sitting at home fervently catching up on their work. No. The snow was a sign that one must relax and enjoy the day off, sipping coffee in the mall, shopping and eating nice food. Lagom extends to all aspects of life. For example:
- one must work hard, but not too hard (9-5 is considered standard; any more is considered crazy)
- one must only buy what one needs, and occasionally what one wants (you could barely tell a rich person apart from someone poor, that is a rich person wouldn't go around flaunting their money and buying crazy amounts of things)
So you get the idea. I rather like this Swedish concept: I just wish the weather in Sweden worked the same way...
2) Modesty of emotion:
This weekend, I was waiting for a bus that was at least 30 min late (an event that rarely occurs in Stockholm unless you are traveling during rush hour or the roads are really bad). Anyway, during the wait, I noticed some Swedes standing next to me--clearly they were irritated with the lateness, but were trying very hard to stifle it. Then something unexpected happened. One of the fellow waiters started yelling and swearing in Swedish. Everyone looked around in panic. It's not often you see a Swede explode in public. I was amused (not in a mean way). Why not just express frustration when needed rather than bottling it up and exploding like an aerosol can? But it seems people think it's almost rude to impose complaints on someone else. But that makes it positively impossible to read people--Do they like you? Do they agree with what you say?
3) Egalitarianism:
This is a really interesting concept. Swedes believe that everyone, regardless of age, rank, gender, education, is equal. All opinions are valued. At the workplace, we often have meetings where everyone is required to state an opinion to a question. When agreement has been reached on an issue, then a collective decision is taken. People also rarely tell you how advanced they are in their education--professors will insist on you calling them by first name, instead of "Professor X".
4) Family:
Family is really important to Swedish people and they spend many vacations getting together with one another. Sweden is really family friendly. One example that illustrates this well has to do with parental leave when a child is born. Both mother and father get 7 months of leave each, and the father is required to take 2 months of leave or else pay a penalty. Can you think of another country that forces parents to spend time with their children? Perhaps, but I have never heard of such a thing. I see equal number of men and women pushing around strollers in Stockholm, and even the buses have extra space in the middle for strollers. Stairs even have this special rolling area just for strollers (it's two ramps that flank some stairs so the parent can push the stroller and walk up the stair at the same time).
5) Respect for privacy:
In general, Swedes keep to themselves to risk invading anyone's privacy, and people prefer to do things themselves (in Swedish "gör dig själv" = do it yourself). They hardly ever go out of their way to help someone, unless that person asked. Don't get me wrong. Swedes are very nice, but that kindness doesn't come unprompted. That's why I was so surprised before winter holidays when someone offered to help me carry my suitcase to the metro. Obviously I looked SO pathetic that even a Swede decided to invade my privacy just to stop me from public embarrassment... hahaha. :)
6) Love of English:
The fact that Swedes are well versed in English is a double-edged sword. It's great when you first arrive in the country and need help finding your way around. It's terrible if you want to learn Swedish because you hardly get practice. Once a Swede knows you speak English, you are stuck in English limbo for almost forever. Swedes LOVE speaking English and take all opportunities to practice (hooray for their enthusiasm). No wonder they are so good. And even if you understand Swedish and reply to them in Swedish, they reply in English. It's a battle of who is most determined and stubborn. One day, I'm totally going to win. :) But alas, I need to get better at Swedish. Basically, I have to get to the point where my Swedish is better than their English, which, believe me, is a loooooooooooong time from now. Speaking of Swedish, wish me luck for my first svenskaprov (Swedish exam) tonight. If I pass, I go to the next level :) If not, well, let's hope there won't be a "if not".
Obviously there are a lot more things to comment about, but those are the prominent ones! Hope you got a bit of insight into life in Sweden.
Hej då!
P.S. Learning Swedish is messing up my English. I have trouble spelling words like "bus" to which I now really want to add an extra "s" (which gives the Swedish word "buss"). So I apologize for any "Swenglish" in this post and those thereafter.
1) The concept of "lagom":
Last Thursday/Friday, Stockholm was hit by a crazy snow storm. We got about 8 or 9 inches of snow (not a lot in comparison to the crazy blizzards in the US). Anyway, there was chaos everywhere because the roads were completely unplowed (how is this possible in a snow-laden country?). In fact all the buses and above-ground trains were canceled due to poor weather conditions. What did this mean? Snow day! Snow day brings me to my first comment on Swedish lifestyle: the term "lagom". Roughly translated, it means everything in moderation. In the advent of snow day, I decided to not walk the 3-4 kilometers to work and went shopping instead. Apparently, every Swede in the area had similar ideas. The mall was packed, and people were basking in the glory of what this snow day had brought them. No one was sitting at home fervently catching up on their work. No. The snow was a sign that one must relax and enjoy the day off, sipping coffee in the mall, shopping and eating nice food. Lagom extends to all aspects of life. For example:
- one must work hard, but not too hard (9-5 is considered standard; any more is considered crazy)
- one must only buy what one needs, and occasionally what one wants (you could barely tell a rich person apart from someone poor, that is a rich person wouldn't go around flaunting their money and buying crazy amounts of things)
So you get the idea. I rather like this Swedish concept: I just wish the weather in Sweden worked the same way...
2) Modesty of emotion:
This weekend, I was waiting for a bus that was at least 30 min late (an event that rarely occurs in Stockholm unless you are traveling during rush hour or the roads are really bad). Anyway, during the wait, I noticed some Swedes standing next to me--clearly they were irritated with the lateness, but were trying very hard to stifle it. Then something unexpected happened. One of the fellow waiters started yelling and swearing in Swedish. Everyone looked around in panic. It's not often you see a Swede explode in public. I was amused (not in a mean way). Why not just express frustration when needed rather than bottling it up and exploding like an aerosol can? But it seems people think it's almost rude to impose complaints on someone else. But that makes it positively impossible to read people--Do they like you? Do they agree with what you say?
3) Egalitarianism:
This is a really interesting concept. Swedes believe that everyone, regardless of age, rank, gender, education, is equal. All opinions are valued. At the workplace, we often have meetings where everyone is required to state an opinion to a question. When agreement has been reached on an issue, then a collective decision is taken. People also rarely tell you how advanced they are in their education--professors will insist on you calling them by first name, instead of "Professor X".
4) Family:
Family is really important to Swedish people and they spend many vacations getting together with one another. Sweden is really family friendly. One example that illustrates this well has to do with parental leave when a child is born. Both mother and father get 7 months of leave each, and the father is required to take 2 months of leave or else pay a penalty. Can you think of another country that forces parents to spend time with their children? Perhaps, but I have never heard of such a thing. I see equal number of men and women pushing around strollers in Stockholm, and even the buses have extra space in the middle for strollers. Stairs even have this special rolling area just for strollers (it's two ramps that flank some stairs so the parent can push the stroller and walk up the stair at the same time).
5) Respect for privacy:
In general, Swedes keep to themselves to risk invading anyone's privacy, and people prefer to do things themselves (in Swedish "gör dig själv" = do it yourself). They hardly ever go out of their way to help someone, unless that person asked. Don't get me wrong. Swedes are very nice, but that kindness doesn't come unprompted. That's why I was so surprised before winter holidays when someone offered to help me carry my suitcase to the metro. Obviously I looked SO pathetic that even a Swede decided to invade my privacy just to stop me from public embarrassment... hahaha. :)
6) Love of English:
The fact that Swedes are well versed in English is a double-edged sword. It's great when you first arrive in the country and need help finding your way around. It's terrible if you want to learn Swedish because you hardly get practice. Once a Swede knows you speak English, you are stuck in English limbo for almost forever. Swedes LOVE speaking English and take all opportunities to practice (hooray for their enthusiasm). No wonder they are so good. And even if you understand Swedish and reply to them in Swedish, they reply in English. It's a battle of who is most determined and stubborn. One day, I'm totally going to win. :) But alas, I need to get better at Swedish. Basically, I have to get to the point where my Swedish is better than their English, which, believe me, is a loooooooooooong time from now. Speaking of Swedish, wish me luck for my first svenskaprov (Swedish exam) tonight. If I pass, I go to the next level :) If not, well, let's hope there won't be a "if not".
Obviously there are a lot more things to comment about, but those are the prominent ones! Hope you got a bit of insight into life in Sweden.
Hej då!
P.S. Learning Swedish is messing up my English. I have trouble spelling words like "bus" to which I now really want to add an extra "s" (which gives the Swedish word "buss"). So I apologize for any "Swenglish" in this post and those thereafter.
